Rowan Daniel Osborne. Whew, what a whirlwind. Our precious little boy was born Thursday, November 4th at 8:19 a.m., weighing 7 lbs 7 oz and 20 inches long. He, of course, was and is perfect! He’s now 19 days old, and mom and dad are finally (sort of) finding a rhythm of life with our new little bundle. I’ll try to post more as I learn to better balance the crazy life of being a mom with a newborn.
Well, I sit here feeling my baby’s hiccups and movements. He’s always been so active. I also think about how this could be the last time I feel these hiccups in my womb. Each time he moves on the inside the closer I become to realizing I need to enjoy this now and relish these times.
Rowan’s due date is coming ever so closer, November 2nd (5 days). With each day passing I’m getting closer to seeing and holding my baby for the first time. In all the excitement, I’m also a bit sad at this close of season of it being only my baby and me. The time is coming where I’ll have to share him with the world and I’ll lose this intimacy I’ve had for nine months. With all that said, I’m extremely excited for Rowan to get here. Each day I wonder, will today be the day? Each pain, I wait to see will this be the labor pain to start the whole birthing process?
I don’t usually do this type of public journaling, but I decided to put it out there. Your dad wrote you one of the sweetest, loving letters to you recently on his blog and it made me cry. I’m listening to the U2 song he mentioned now.
I just want you to know how much I love you. I see you move around now as I type and I’m reminded how much I love feeling your movements. I know I will miss them when you’re born. Even though I daydream about what you’ll look like, whose personality you’ll take after, what kind of man you’ll grow to be; I know when I meet you for the first time all those dreams won’t be able to compare to holding you and seeing it all develop before my eyes. You’ll be all I could have never truly imagined.
I want you to know I’ve always loved you and will always love you, no matter what. I’ve tried to take care of you the best I can while you’re in my womb, and I’ll continue to do so for the rest of your life. I know I’ll cry when you cry, laugh when you laugh, be angry when you’re angry. I also don’t doubt that there will be hard times that we’ll have to get through, but I know there will be great times too. We know that we aren’t perfect and that we will fail you at some point, too. And that’s okay. Your dad and I talk about how we will always make sure you know who you are as a human being, not just as our son. We will take time to help you see the world and understand life around you.
Since I knew I was pregnant I’ve prayed that you’ll be a boy and man after God’s heart. A man who loves justice and peace. A man who respects and loves nature, animals and all on the earth and sea and sky. But I want you to know that I will give you room to explore who you are and discover what you love and who you want to grow to be.
Psalm 121:5-8 (NRSV)
The Lord is your keeper;
the Lord is your shade at your right hand.
The sun shall not strike you by day,
nor the moon by night.
The Lord will keep you from all evil;
he will keep your life.
The Lord will keep
your going out and your coming in
from this time on and for evermore.
This blog is in the startup phase. I look forward to sharing with you all.